Pale Wire (Popscene)

Tuesday, April 27, 2004

Sox Appeal

Last week, the Chicago White Sox marketing director "resigned." Today in the Tribune, Bill Veeck's son Mike, and a long list of other notables, give their advice on how the Sox (who only drew around 11,000 people to the 2nd home game of the year) can start packing the seats again.

Mike Veeck, minor-league baseball executive, son of one-time White Sox owner Bill Veeck and the promotional mind behind Circus Freak Night, Mullet Night, Lawyers Night (all attorneys had to pay double) and, of course, Disco Demolition: "I would declare war on the Cubs. I would schedule all night games. I would never have a day game, pointing out the fact that we have to work on the South Side. . . . I'd name a section of the park Wrigleyville, maybe fence it in. I'd have some fun with it. I'd promote heavily to families. I'd go after young kids too. Last year [when he was a consultant] in Detroit, after every home game we had two players at each end of the dugout signing autographs for 20 minutes. On their own time. It took a lot of guts [the Tigers had lost 119 games the year before], but every night they were signing. The Sox have a fun team and strike me as a friendly bunch. So go after the families. Make that connection with the kids. Tickets at Wrigley Field are so hard to come by, and you don't see families out there. Why not go after the market they left open and go after the kids?"

Comedian Bob Odenkirk, who does those new Miller Beer for President commercials and played Garry Shandling's agent on the Larry Sanders Show (editor's note: also of Mr. Show, motherfuckers): "I'd consider hiring Courtney Love as the mascot. You could get her to do some `dancing' on top of the dugouts between innings because, as P.T. Barnum once said, `Everybody loves a crazy old stripper!'"

Late last week, Sun-Times columnist Greg Couch suggested the Sox hire actually Mike Veeck. Now there's a great idea! Baseball on the Southside could be fun again! Too bad Reinsdorf will never do it.